I’ve decided that since I’m slower to get out the more “official” blog posts, I’m going to start doing a weekly brain dump here. There is almost ALWAYS some sort of topic on my mind that I ruminate on for the week (ayyyy the life of an overthinker), so I thought why not get some of that out with some rambling/journaling on the blog?
You know how you always hear people say, “There just aren’t enough hours in the day”?
Well, unfortunately I’m not here to tell you that this statement is nonsense and you only need to make time or use your time more wisely. You know why? I’m not some self-help guru who says you can do whatever you put your mind to with the power of positive thinking! In fact, I have a really hard time finding enough time myself.
I want to do a lot of things.
I want to read books, I want to read fanfiction, I want to finish DIY on a coffee table, I want to write for the blog more consistently, I want to make other blog related content more consistently, I want to work on my soaps, I want to work on better marketing for my soaps, I want to write creatively every day, I want to take courses to learn about more things, I want to draw, I want to journal, I want to take more pictures with my camera, I want to decorate my walls, I want to exercise daily, I want to spend quality time with Chris + Eli, I want to watch more documentaries, I want to learn to be fluent in another language, I want to go on more walks/hikes, I want to see my friends more often, I want to plan future trips, and I want more regular family/date night activities.
It’s a lot of things and I try my damnedest to write a million lists to keep myself organized with time so I am able to do these things, but I feel like it always falls short. With a full time job and regular household tasks, these things I truly enjoy doing and would gladly spend all of my hours on seem to fall to the wayside. I can normally fit in a few of them, but I still get bummed about anything being sacrificed.
I don’t want to be the person who regrets not doing the things I have always wanted to.
I try to stay up later in order to do more, but eventually sleep calls me to the point where I can barely keep my eyes open. I have tried to alternate and do some things on one day and some things on another so I can at least spend time on them all in a week, but that doesn’t feel right for me either.
It’s a slippery slope and I wish I could sacrifice the other things instead, but alas I need a job to get by and don’t want to live in a messy house with no clean clothes either.
I know I get a lot more done than most on the side, but I’ve always been a person with so many interests that I want to explore and it’s hard for me to feel like I’m reaching my full potential as a person when I don’t get to do them like I’d like to. I remember it being so much easier to explore them all when I was younger with less responsibilities. Guys, adulthood rocks! Am I right?
We all have the same hours in the day and I’m sure a lot of us experience this problem more than we let on. I have managed a bit more balance now that I work from home and I know a lot of people during the pandemic were not as lucky.
Currently, my balance is wobbly and I’m only doing the one thing I know how to do – keep on trying and tweaking things to make it less wobbly. Hopefully I’ll find that sweet spot.
I could go on about this for a long time, because it’s something on my mind more often than not, but now my mind is wanting to go back and edit everything like a formal blog post, so I will stop here. I hope this first edition of Cheyenne’s Weekly Brain Dump was not too rambling for you! I think it will be a good outlet for this overthinker to get some thoughts out into the world instead of clogging up my brain.